Waiting, waiting, waiting

I hate waiting. Sometimes it seems like that's all I do since I got into CTMH. I won't be having my first Jumpstart party until Nov. 5th which is till two weeks away. I've had one order already that I asked to wait until the party to put the order in (luckily she was moving and is in no rush for the items), and I would encourage people to order from me but I want to wait until the party. GRRRRR. To bring me back to earth slightly I have not really done anything to prepare for my party at this point. I want to make Christmas Cards but I don't have any definite ideas yet. Lots of maybes, just no certainly's.

I did promise to post my first completed layout, so I'll do that tonight.

Things are going my way

At first it didn't seem like it. Last Thursday, I got a voicemail when I got home from work from Close To My Heart customer service wanting me to call them back. I had waited all day for something from them. I called Friday morning only to find out that the email 'whitneysctmh' was not acceptable. Delayed! I was going crazy on Monday when my kit didn't arrive on Saturday. I had made Jack promise to call me if it came while he was at home. No call! I came home in quite the mood. I was reluctantly making spagetti when the doorbell rang. The UPS finally shows up at 7pm at night. What the? My beautiful box was finally here, which I immediately proceed to tear open and pull out all the contents of. I've never felt so excited in my life besides right before I got married, the morning we were having my daughter and one of the last Christmas's before I decided that there was so such person as Santa and that the present didn't just magically appear under the Christmas tree.

That night I had my plan of action for the next day, Tuesday or yesterday. I had printed out Stamp of the Month flyers, put my name, phone number and email address on everything, and had an Idea Book ready for my husband to take to work with him. Then, Tuesday, flyers went up, a notice on the company message boards went up, the Idea Book I had with me was set very conscpicously on the corner of my desk, and I was ready. Talk about anti-climatic. There was the little irrational part of me that hoped that flocks of ladies would fly to my desk, all a-flutter to check out the tons of cute items I had for sale. No one really noticed that I had become a new person. I was Whitney, Indepedant Consultant for Close To My Heart scrapbooking and stamping supplies.

When I got home yesterday, I spoke with my upline for about an hour and a half inundating her with questions, and planning my very first party (Nov. 5). I decided to check my email, just because, and low and behold there is an email in there!! Some gal at my works wants to do a party after Thanksgiving. I immediately broke out into a happy dance. My husband has always known I was crazy but I think that just proved his point for him. I called my upline back, I called my sister, and I tried to call my mom but her phone was off.

Oh, and by the way, my baby has her second tooth. But mom didn't get to know that until today.

Finally!

I got the call today. My husband called me today and stated that we finally have enough money left over after this payday to start my Close To My Heart business!!!!! I am so excited. I've been tellling people for months I'm going to do it, but we never seemed to have the money. Now I'm so excited that we do.

The call to my future supervisor was almost anti-climatic in a way. I called my sister-in-law who has the phone number the consultant I'm going through and told her and to get Suzeanne's phone number. She got excited for me. I hung up and dialed the number - only to get a voicemail. Grrrr! I want to start right now, or at least know I'm getting things started, not leaving a message on a voicemail to call me back. Scrapbooking supplies at practically cost. It boggles my mind.

On a completely separate, barely related note, I lost my eBay bid today. Whoever it was outbid me by 50 freaking cents! $10.50. I was so bugged until I found someone else selling the exact samething on a "Buy It Now" for only $7. Take that punk!!

Up All Night

This weekend I made my first attempt at creating a totally original layout. When it's done I'll scan it and post it here but it was an idea I got from scanning a bunch of other people's layout idea webpages. It's titled Our Garden and it includes lily of the vally like flowers with pictures of all my and my husband's immediate family members, the centerpiece being us with daisy like flowers of our faces. Since I'm just beginning and being one that makes things a bit harder than they have to be, I've basically created everything so far by Paintshop Pro, clipart I found off the internet, and my own imagination. I'm sure I could spend hundreds of dollars on similar items making my scrapbooking a lot easier but my thoughts are why spend all that money to get something that is not exactly what I want? The drawback of course is that I spend at least 4 hours last night cleaning up the clipart of the flowers and stems to the way I wanted them to look, sizing them to the right size (reams and reams of paper printed on both sides) and then cutting and pasting everyone's faces to fit on the flower bells and sizing those. What a mess! The end result, however, is that the page is looking exactly how I want it. I'm still not done. I have yet to figure out how to make the flowers that my little family will occupy. I think I need to buy some flower templates and a compass.

Aloha

I am going to Hawaii tomorrow. I should be packing; I should be packed. Instead I am writing a post about the fact that I should be packing (packed) instead of actually doing it. I've lost the motivation after looking at the disaster that is my house and get that feeling of throwing in the towel for the night. I don't want to do that either because I'll wake up tomorrow morning with that sense of panic that nothing has been done. I won't be able to enjoy the morning getting my daughter ready to join her grandparents in tropical paradise.

I must say I am soooo excited. I've never been either and I can't wait. I want to go snorkeling. I want to see Pearl Harbor. I want to take one of those cool pictures of the sun setting over the ocean. I wanted to see a volcano but it's my understanding that there are no active ones on Oahu. Oh, well. I want to come home burnt crispy (while my husband and daughter are nice rich brown) and with tons of crap jammed into my suitcase that wasn't there when we left. And I want a camera full of pictures I can use to justify the really cute tiki scrapbooking set I found on eBay the other day.

To eBay or Not to eBay

I am not allowing myself to eBay. eBay is a very, very bad thing. eBay shows me way too much stuff I would love to buy but don't have the ability to justify the expense. AAAHHHHHH!!!! Spending withdrawl, spending withdrawl. We have been so tight these last few weeks I have not allowed myself out of my apartment without my husband for fear I'll take a quick trip to the mall, to Michaels or Joanns, or to Walmart. It was all innocent. I wanted to find scrapbooking supplies to do layouts for my upcoming vacation, and before me like a mountain of Dove chocolates is all the Hawaiian scrapbooking I could handle. Tears of frustration well up in my eyes. Sometimes I wish I had chosen a less expensive hobby. But it's too late now. I have the fever for brads, stickers, textured paper, stamps and gluesticks.

Say What???

I'm posting again today because I heard something so ridiculous on the radio, I laughed out loud in my car.

Brittney Spears had her baby today by c-section. When asked why she was having a c-section instead of delivering vaginally, do you know what she said? "Because I don't like to be in pain." Whaaaaa??? Sucker. Yet again Ms. Spears is a perfect representative of the sterotype for the fair-haired. In pain? You couldn't have chosen a worse option. I had my own child by c-section. Not by choice. She was in distress when my OBGYN and I decided on surgery. I would have much rather taken the vaginal/epidural route. At least your in a labor at the most for a few hours. You're in serious pain with a c-section for several DAYS!! Her idiocy amazes me, and that we continue to support this idiocy by buying her albums makes me wonder - who is the bigger fool, the fool or the fool who follows him (or her in this case)?

Morning Sunshine!

Imagine waking up to this sweet face every morning? I could not drag myself out of bed this morning even though I have the excitement of going to Hawaii in less than 4 days. It's that all-around crappy feeling. I pulled myself out of bed and could hear my little girl cry-talking to herself in the other room. I opened the door to behold this adorable face look up at me from over the crib railing. How did I get so lucky? That smile made it all worth dragging my cruddy bum out of bed.

Jack and I talked last night again about starting my Close to My Heart business. I'm so frustrated. Ever since I announced I was planning on doing it, so many people have approached me with an interest in buying from me. I should have kept my mouth shut. I'm hoping we can work out the financial part of it after we get back from Hawaii. Please bless that this thing gets started before Christmas!

It's funny because starting my own scrapbooking consultant business was born of my desire to stay home with my daughter. I know that I can go anywhere with it. At the same time, a small fear popped up last night as my husband and I talked about it. What if all these people who say they are so interested, when it comes right down it, aren't so interested? What if the only person buying things from me is me? What if we kill ourselves trying to get this $150 put together only to have me fail miserably, leaving me feel like it was a big waste of money and effort? I could drive myself crazy thinking about all the negative things, and I keep telling myself that I need to just take that leap of faith, try it and go forward with as much ambition, motivation, and dedication as I've been telling myself I need to have all these years. I doing it for Maddy but I'm doing it mostly for me. My vow - I will not disappoint myself!!!